As we speak, I’m sitting on my friend’s couch, thinking I should clean up some toys before her mom arrives. I came over here late afternoon because their parents needed to head to the hospital to deliver a new sibling. Monica (4) and James (almost 3) are very funny little people. We watched some “Monkey George.” Monica told me all about her latest bout of diarrhea, showed me some funny and scary faces, asked where Mama is. At some point her dad texted me to say they were admitted and things were moving along. He sent a pic of mama on the hospital bed in the gown to show the kids. So I showed them. Monica wanted to see the baby. “The baby’s still in Mama’s tummy.” Oh. James wanted to see the baby, I pointed at Mama’s tummy, still in her tummy. “Where?” So I pointed again, “There. There’s the baby in her tummy, see the baby bump?”
For the next three hours James asked, “Why the baby bump bump?” “Baby in Mama’s tummy go bump bump?” There’s no explaining to a not quite three year old about a baby bump. Or that the baby didn’t go bump. Instead I tried to pass it off “Baby go bump out of Mama’s tummy.” When the baby arrived and I told the kids the news, James’ first words: “Baby go bump bump?” I think I’ll let dad explain further than that some other time.
Monica piped up explaining to James that we can tell the baby is a girl because girls have long hair. Um. Luckily there was an infant picture of bald Monica on the fridge, so I explained that most babies don’t have much hair but it will get long when she’s bigger, just like Monica. Luckily she accepted that explanation and didn’t ask how else we differentiate boy from girl. Whew.
We sent some short videos of the kids sending messages to the new sister. Monica’s advice all had to do with being with Mom. “You really need your Mom baby!” James just wanted to know if the baby went bump bump.
My work here is obviously done. You’re welcome, Mom and Dad, you’re welcome.
In other entertainment, Monica asked me at some point who my parents were. I told her. Then she asked who my kids were. “I don’t have any kids.”
Monica: “Oh. Because you can’t find anyone to marry you. Because you’re an adult now. Because you can drive. And you can drive a van. But maybe it took you a long time learning how to drive a van. But now you can. So now maybe you’re almost ready to find a husband when you grow up.”
Apparently it is all about the van driving skillz. And Monica thinks I’m almost ready. Good to know.
Spending time with toddlers is priceless. And I can’t wait to meet the new girlie. What a blessed life I live.