Living in Reality

A friend shared that she has been in counselling recently. Now this particular friend blows me away — she is a classy, together, on time, gang busters, successful kind of gal, and for the second or third appointment in a row, she was late and pretty upset about it (so familiar). The counsellor decided to dig deeper. What was really going on here? Why was my friend late? She was in the middle of something and thought she could get 10 more minutes in on that project, check her mail, pay a bill and then drive 20 minutes across town, all in a half hour. Her counsellor told her: You aren’t living in reality. Live in reality. If it takes 20 minutes to get across town, don’t assume you can do it in 10 minutes. Live in reality.

My friend shared this a few weeks back and ever since it has been echoing in my own head. Live in reality Reenie.

Have you ever known people who are constantly posting all sorts of deep and meaningful quotes all over the interwebs, participating in fascinating discussions and debates over deep topics… and meanwhile, the house was literally falling apart around them? It makes it hard to take the philosophizing seriously, doesn’t it? It makes you wonder where the rubber meets the road. Where does the philosophizing about a life one wants actually meet the life we are living? Are you living in reality? Am I??

Yeah, that’s right, sometimes I’m that guy. Totally out of whack with reality and in need of a serious reality check.

In the absence of having my own children, my dogs are a good reminder to me when I am overdoing it. Suzie turns into the world’s neediest critter when I haven’t been home enough and Maggie begins eating the bathroom trash (or some other disgusting show of neglect). And it isn’t just them! When I am overdoing it, I turn into the world’s neediest critter myself. Suzie and her desperation for affection is nothing in comparison to the exhausted person living in my body, desperate for something but too tired to figure it out. Not to mention the villain in my head condemning my lack of progress, my inability to function, my ability to cry at the drop of a hat… Yeah, it might not be eating the bathroom trash, but it sure isn’t pretty.

In the last few months, my life has been insane. Pedal to the metal insane. Emotional. Stressful. Grace filled. Crazy. And it is time to stop and take a deep breath. It is time to re-examine where I’ve lost touch with reality in my own life. In my own priorities.

So here’s my reality check for today: Relaxation and taking time to unwind is an important part of life. Live in reality Reenie and stop trying to always accomplish more than is humanly possible and then beating yourself up over not being able to do it all. And consciously build in time to relax, to do something creative, to enjoy life!!

Do you need a reality check?

One thought on “Living in Reality

  1. Praying for you! Thanks for that reminder to live in reality. You know, I've started a Sunday tradition called “Betsy time” where I leave the kids with Mark (in your case work, friends, dogs, etc.) and get out of dodge for a coupe/few hours – be it to read at a coffee shop, pray at Adoration, shop for silliness at Goodwill – whatever sounds relaxation and life-giving to me. It's like a little retreat where I slip out of reality so that when I return home I can enter it somewhat recharged. …just a thought.

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