More Crazylark

Yesterday my mom stopped in at the office after her raw milk pick up, right around the corner from work. Owen came with her, driving. Did you hear that? My little Owen has his learner’s permit. It’s terrifying and crazy and exciting all at the same time. How on earth is my baby brother old enough to drive though? Yikes.

Where was I? Mama and Owen stopping at the office to say hi. After they left, B looked at me quizzically for a few minutes and said, “So how many kids do you want to have?” I stared right back trying to come up with the answer. He continued, “Fifteen?” Me: “Well, that might be a stretch, but sure. Somewhere in that neighborhood.” He looked a little surprised but we both went back to work and I thought we had dropped it.

Hours later, as I was trying to finish things up and go home, L walked over to my desk and says, out of the blue, “Well, if you are going to start having kids, we are going to need a nursery in here!” She was clearly ruffled by the whole idea.

My mind was blown. “L, when I start having kids, you can just replace me.”
L, even more ruffled: “No no no no.”
Me: “L, I’m not married and I’m not even dating, I’m no where close to having kids. Someday, hopefully, but no time soon. You’ll have plenty of notice.”
L: “Oh. So… you want to be married before you have kids? You wouldn’t want to have some on your own?”

What does one say here? Of course! Not that some people don’t raise their children on their own for different reasons, but I certainly wouldn’t choose it! I tried to sound calm and affirmed that I want to find the right man and have a family with him. She agreed that it is tough, but thought having them on your own would be okay if you couldn’t find the right one. Sigh. I sometimes forget the world I live in. Fascinating.

And yes, I do want 15 kids but I definitely want to have them with someone else — the right someone. Seems like a good thing to hold out for.

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